The sky and the star: Part one.

There was only one star in the night before I met him. I remember you. Your smile, your eagerness for figure me out, the way you came into my life when I needed you. I better not think about you, otherwise I will star regretting the decision that I’m about to make. I’ll be dead when you finish this. I just want you to know that there was nothing I could’ve done. You need to know that this is the only way I can safe him. You’re clueless right? Don’t be. Before I kill myself, I want to tell you a story, my story. I wish you could understand me. In my story I fell in love with a boy, a man. What’s curious of all is that I don’t regret it. Not a single kiss, a single word. I want to die, because he’ll live.

Like I started saying there was only one star in the night before I met him. Even then the universe understood that it was that night where our story began. Even if I had no clue that I would meet him next day, the universe did. The sky and the star, they belong to each other, like he belonged with me. My name is Clarissa and I fell in love with a demon called Billy.

I must admit we didn’t start on the best terms. I had just turned 18. I was heartbroken by a previous boyfriend. I tried to get better, but one night I just got tired of my part in the society that told me I was supposed to be perfect. Everyone in the society is perfect. Those who aren’t, they are destroyed. Not literally of course, but their friends and family they push you away. Billy was destroyed a long time ago. He sold his soul to the devil. I didn’t care anymore. I went to a bar in the middle of the night. There was not a star in the sky that day, but it didn’t matter because like I said our story began the last night. I wanted to sleep with someone that day. Billy… he was my first choice. A lonely guy sitting down the corner trying to forget everything he ever had and lost. I tried to talk to him, flirt with him, showing my intentions. But he wasn’t interested. He told me “Go away little girl”. If I had gone away maybe I would be alive. A lot could’ve happen in that night,  I could’ve slept with Billy, I could’ve go home, I could’ve slept with somebody else. But instead of that, driven by a curiosity of this injured man, this injured black sky, I told him “No”. He turned around, like he noticed me for the first time. I swear of god in that time, we remember. Even if it wasn’t something clear, more like a feeling, I remembered the entire dark romantic story our souls were meant to play. He told me about the time he killed someone. By the way he was telling me, I noticed it was the first time he told anyone the truth. It wasn’t an accident, it wasn’t in self defense. He wanted to kill him. He wanted to kill him because by his death he would ruin others he hated. The problem was that he loved this person, and the people love him back. Her name was Mina. She was beautiful. Messed up Snow white he called her. Snow white had her hair black as night, her skin pale as snow, and her lips red as blood. Mina, had her hair red as blood, her eyes black as night and her breathing was pale as snow. Mina was dying from leukemia.

Billy arranged a meeting with Mina, to treat her as his doctor. But Mina didn’t show up, her brother did. Marcus didn’t recognize Billy, but he definitely remembered him. Marcus was the guy that abused her little sister when she was at high school, and then discredited her version of the story. Finally the sister went insane, believing the story that Marcus told, and throw herself of a window. Billy wanted revenge, and he would do it by killing Mina. But the plan complicated when he met her. They fell in love. He was so devoted to saving Mina, that finally he did it. After the dinner they did with Mina’s family on a celebration for beating cancer, he saw a photograph of his little sister. Billy went insane that night, and while Mina was in the shower, getting reading to face a life without the constant fear of dying, he took a knife and put it inside her chest, several times.

I ran out of the bar when he told me that. I was too scared to talk to anyone, and I begged he didn’t follow me. Of course, after a second of numbness, he found me. I was sure he was going to kill. Why wouldn’t he? He killed his own love, why wouldn’t he kill a stranger? But when he reached me, he began to cry. He was so dark, and so damaged. I could’ve run away. But I didn’t. I stayed.